Politeness costs little

This evening I went for a walk  with She Who Must be Obeyed At All Times and a friend in "our" woods, several square miles of Crown Estate land just outside Bracknell.  It's quite hectic on warm evenings because hulking great brutes on mountain bikes hurtle round it at about mach 1, but one can, if one tries very hard, ignore them.

To be fair, most are polite, sensible and ride with care.  But the idiots, they are quite another thing!

So there we were, the three of us, in conversation walking not unreasonably three abreast on a wide enough path when we heard the ominous semi-silent approach of the lycra clad stealth cyclist.  And he, bless him, in his natty white lycra top, wind tunnel designed crash hat and really silly dark glasses to keep the wind out of his little red piggy eyes, weaved through an impossible gap between us. 

Wordlessly.

"Thank you!" I said, loudly.

Stealth cyclist wobbled and stopped.  He seemed put out that he ought to have said thank you to us for getting out of his tubby lycra clad way.

We had a conversation.  He, bless him, maintained that cyclists have right of way!  We, the walkers, should keep an eye out for fat lycra clad jerks who career through the woods and churn the paths to a quagmire.

He got off his bike, so I asked him if he intended to hit me.  He was looking rather menacing.  I was careful to keep my hands on the end of my arms, and to have those folded so that, while I doubtless looked stocky, I could not be said to have threatened him at all.  I was merely asking politely to be thanked.

He chose to give me a lecture about the fact that he pays for a permit (note that means that he has permission, not a right) to cycle in the woods and that we, as walkers, both got in his way and paid nothing!

I found I was thinking that I would not like to be managed by him.  He seemed like an insubstantial middle manager.  I hope very much that he meets the recession head on.  Oh, and loses, of course.  

We discussed lycra clad idiots as we continued our walk.  It's not worth complaining to the Crown Estate, of course.  Been there, done that, but their chief person likes revenue, and cyclists pay money.  But we did discuss manners.

All one needs to do as a cyclist is to approach walkers with care and respect, make them aware politely of your presence, and ask, if necessary, if you might pass.  And then thank them.

But, in the same way that red traffic lights do not affect the unidentifiable loons, nor do manners.

At least this one will be physically fit when he is made redundant!  I do hope it happens soon.  He looked to be unemployable.